Welcome to Adventures at the Creepermat!

I started this blog because I constantly find myself being amused, disgusted, or simply baffled by the things that occur while I am situated at the laundromat.

I'm sure you're wondering why the heck I call it the Creepermat. A few of my friends and I refer to weird people as Creepers. Laundromats seem to be a haven for the weird, the destitute, and the generally entertaining to watch.

I've been doing laundry in public laundromats since I moved out on my own in 2004. I used to loathe it and put it off for as long as I could, often going nearly a month without doing laundry. The past year, though, I've realized what a gold mine of observations I've come up with during just about every laundromat experience, and I've finally motivated myself to kick the procrastination and start a damn blog about it already.

I live in the Ohio Valley; the nearest small towns, and the ones where I usually end up with my 6 baskets of pee-stained kid sheets, grease-smelling Garfield's uniforms, and 79 pairs of underwear, are St Clairsville OH and Wheeling WV. The nearest large city is Pittsburgh, which is over an hour away. I'm sure that information alone is enough to allude to the types of people I encounter on these adventures. I am at the top of Appalachia, before you venture into Wrong Turn territory. Rednecks and the general span of low to lower middle class folks are my usual company.

Enjoy, and be sure to leave comments and feedback for me!

-Shannon

Apr 13, 2010

Ludes.

After a few weeks of not being able to afford to go to a public laundromat to wash the 12 loads that have piled up in my bedroom, I finally got a chance to take a couple of loads in yesterday. I had my (almost) 3 year old son with me, so I didn't figure I was going to be able to do much observing since my eyes would be attached to his constantly moving little body making sure he didn't break something or run out the door.

My initial entrance proved disappointing, as the only occupants were a few empty baskets parked next to a few running washers. This meant that people were in and out, though, so it was a glimmer of hope. I put my stuff in the washer and took the kid for a short walk around the block.

Upon my return, my clothes had 11 more minutes of having water and Gain beaten into them, so I parked myself on one of the chairs while the kid walked circles around the folding table finding "clues" and writing them down in his "handy dandy notebook."

He came over to me and wanted to sit in the chair where I was sitting, so I moved. He sat down, got up, then wanted the chair I moved to. This game of musical chairs continued until a guy walked in looking like he just stepped out of a time machine from the 70s, lude addiction and all. He had frazzled, wavy, chin-length dirty blond hair and was tall and very thin. He walked with an awkward gait, his tiny frame barely able to hold up his vintage-y dress pants. He wore an ill-fitting long-sleeve shirt and a pair of rose-colored shades, completing the acid-flashback look with a pair of old man loafers. Apparently he wasn't wearing underwear, because I saw his crack every time he walked by. I tried snapping a photo, but my camera on my current phone was too noisy, and he turned after I snapped one; it turned out blurry because I shifted myself so that it looked like I was taking a photo of my son.

A few women came in to put their clothes in dryers. The kid and I went back to musical chairs for a few minutes, then I put my clothes in the dryer and decided to take the kid to the park for the 45 minutes it was going to take for them to dry. As I walked outside, I saw 70s dude sitting in an 80s model Camaro. I figured he was confused about what time period he wanted to represent.

When I came back, gathered my clothes, and stuck them in the car with the kid, 70s dude was leaving as well. He flung his basket of wet clothes in his passenger seat, jumped in his car, turned it on, and out blared......techno music? I was expecting Simon and Garfunkel or The Doors. Weirdest guy ever.

I need to start charging my digital camera so that I can take noiseless photos for your enjoyment...and mine.